Songs

All Australians, born illegitimate

All Australians, born illegitimate, born illegitimate, born illegitimate
All Australians, born illegitimate, b**tards through and through

They aint got no birth certificate, birth certificate, birth certificate
They aint got no birth certificate, b**tards through and through

They don't quite know who the father is, who the father is, who the father is,
They don't quite know who the father is, b**tards through and through

The Union Jack is on the Aussie flag, on the Aussie flag, on the Aussie flag,
The Union Jack is on the Aussie flag, b**tards through and through

Always a Woman

She's got the greatest tongue work
That you’ve ever seen
She licks both my balls till
They're shiny and clean
And her pink little pussy's
As tight as it can be
I know it's the cat but
It feels like a woman to me

And the Hairs

And the hairs,
And the hairs,
And the hairs on her d**ky-di-do,
Hang down to her knees,
One black one, one white one,
And one with a bit of shite on,
One with a fairy light on
To lead us the way

Asshole, Asshole

Asshole, asshole,
A soldier I would be,

To piss, to piss,
Two pistols on my knee.

f**k you, f**k you,
For curiosity.

To fight for the old c**t
To fight for the old c**t
Fight for the old country.

Bestiality

Tune: Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Boys

CHORUS:
Bestiality's best boys,
Bestiality's best, f**k a wallabee.
Bestiality's best boys,
Bestiality's best

Blessing the Hares

Bless these hares,
Bless this trail,
Cops no catch us,
Bogans no shoot us,
Dog no bite us,
Heat no stroke us,
Plenty of cold beer and bubbly to drink,
Hope we all get laid tonight.

Cross-Dressing Hashing Man

Tune: Popeye, the Sailor Man

He's a cross-dressing hashing man
toot, toot

Wears garters whenever he can
toot, toot

With bra straps too tight,
but panties just right,
he's a cross-dressing hashing man

toot, toot

Dinah

Tune: I've Been Working on the Railroad

Dinah, won't you blow me,
Dinah, won't you blow me,
Dinah, won't you blow my horn?

Dinah, won't you blow me,
Dinah, won't you blow me,
Dinah, won't you blow my horn?

Someone's in my sister's vagina,
Someone's in my sister, I know,
Someone's in my sister's vagina,
f**kin' like a dynamo.

Do your balls/tits hang low

Do your balls hang low?
Do your balls hang low?
Do they wobble to and 'fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you throw them over your shoulder like a continental soldier
Do your balls hang low?

Dough the Stuff

Dough the stuff that buys my beer
Ray, the guy who sells me beer
Me, the one who drinks my beer
Far, a long way to the john
So, I’ll have another beer
La, I ‘ll have another beer
Tea, no thanks I’ll have a beer
That’ll bring us back to Down Down Down Down...

Fellatio Song

Tune: For he's a jolly good fellow

For he enjoys fellatio
For he enjoys fellatio
For he enjoys fellation
He swallows everytime
He swallows everytime
He swallows everytime

For he enjoys fellatio...

Fuck a Duck

f**k a duck, a female duck,
Screw a baby kangaroo.
Finger-bang an orangutan,
Let an elephant do you.

Fell the penis of an eel,
Whack the asshole of a yak.
Masturbate with a gnu,
And that will bring you back to,
f**k, f**k, f**k, f**k...

Has anyone seen my cock?

Has anybody seen my cock,
My big Rhode Island Red?
He's mostly pink, with a little bit of blue,
And he's purple on his head.
He stands straight up in the morning,
And he gives me wife a shock,
Has anybody seen, anybody seen,
Anybody, anybody seen my cock?

He's a right big-headed little upstart,
The best you've ever seen.
He could have got gonorrhea,
Instead he got gangrene.
He should have worn a condom,
But the silly sod forgot,
Has anybody seen, has anybody seen,
Has anybody seen my cock?

Hash Shirt

Tune: Meet the Flintstones

Hash shirt...
Where's your hash shirt?
You’re the cheapest b**tard in history

Hash shirt.. Buy a hash shirt.
So you can join us in debauchery

He's the meanest

He's the meanest,
He sucks the horse's penis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

All he does is pound it,
Ever since he found it,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

[alt verse]
He's the lamest,
He licks the horse's anus,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

Heres to Brother/Sister Hasher(s)

Tune: Ach, Du Lieber, Augustin

Here's to brother hasher
B4other hasher, brother hasher
Here's to brother hasher
May he chug-a-lug

He's happy, he's jolly,
He's f**ked up by golly,
Here's to brother hasher
May he chug-a-lug

So drink motherf**ker
Drink motherf**ker
Drink motherf**ker
Drink motherf**ker

Hey Hey we’re the Hashers

Tune: Hey Hey we’re the Monkeys

Here we cummm
Cumming down your street
We get the funniest looks from..
Everyone we meet.
Hey Hey we’re the hashers.

People say we run/cycle around
We’re to busy drinking.
To put anybody down down down down

I'm a little sex pot

Tune: I'm a little tea pot

I'm a little sex pot
short and stout
Here are my handles
Here is my spout
When I get all f**ked up
Hear me shout
Tip me over
and eat me out

It's a Small Dick

Tune: It's a Small World

Well it isn't long and it isn't thick,
It gets hard too slow and it cums too quick,
It gets lost in her twat,
But it's all that he's got,
It's a small, small d**k.

It's a small d**k after all,
It's a small d**k after all,
Always limp from alcohol,
It's a small, small, d**k!

Jesus Saves

Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic

 

Notes: This song usually begins with an optional verse before the chorus is sung, but I’ve still listed the optional verses afterwards. For optional verses, the line is repeated three times before “Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves” is sung. At the conclusion of the song hashers usually fall to their knees and pray with the refrain “Jesus we’re only kidding.”

CHORUS:
Free beer for all the hashers;
Free beer for all the hashers;
Free beer for all the hashers;
Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves!

Optional Verses:
Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause he’s nailed upon the cross;
All the harriettes love Jesus ’cause he’s hung like this (spread out arms);
Jesus don’t need flour ’cause he lays the trail in blood;
Don’t give your beer to Jesus ’cause he’ll turn it into wine;
Jesus won’t come hashing because Judas pissed him off;
Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause he’s only got 12 friends.
Jesus can’t go hashing, he’s got shiggy on his head.
Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause his wood is just too big.
Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause his dad knows all the trails.
Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause his wife is such a whore.
Jesus can't go hashing cause he's mowing my front lawn
Jesus can't go hashing cause he only knows one whore
Jesus can't go hashing cause the shiggy's on his head

Love Me Tender

Tune: Love Me Tender

Love me tender
Love me sweet
Wrap your lips
around my meat
Watch me quiver
Watch me grin
As my cum
drips down down down

Mrs. Murphy

Take it by the hand Mrs Murphy,
It only weighs a quarter of a pound,
Its got hair around it’s neck like a turkey,
And it comes when you stroke it up and down,
Down, down, down...

My One Skin Hangs Down to My Two Skin

Tune: My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean

My one skin hangs down to my two skin,
My two skin hangs down to my three,
My three skin hangs down to my foreskin
My foreskin hangs down to my knee.

CHORUS:
Roll back, roll back,
Please roll back my foreskin for me, for me.
Roll back, roll back,
Please roll back my foreskin for me.

Ou Est le Papier?

Tune: Marseillaise

A Frenchman went to the lavat'ry
To have him a jolly good shit,
He took his coat and trousers off
So that he could revel in it.
But when he reached for the paper
He found that someone had been there before,
"Ou est le papier?"
Ou est le papier?
Monsieur, monsieur, J'at fait manure.
Ou est le papier?

Put Your Leg Over My Shoulder

Tune: Side by Side

Put your left leg over my shoulder,
Put your right leg over my shoulder,
(Wag tongue)
La-la-la-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.

Put your left tit over my shoulder,
Put your right tit over my shoulder,
(Shake head side to side)
Bla-bla-bla-bla, bla-bla-bla, bla-bla-bla.

Rule Britannia

Rule Britannia, marmalade and jam,
Five Chinese crackers up your asshole,
BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG!

Shitty Trail (song for the Hares)

S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L
Shitty trail
Shitty trail
The mother f**kers laid a shitty trail
S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L

Short down down song

This is your down-down song, It isn’t very long.
Drink it down, down, down, down...

Sweet Heart Song

Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you
Let me suck your nipples
til they're black and blue
Let me lick your pussy
til it's wet with GU
Let me slip my willy
up your ole' wazoo

Swing Low

Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.

I looked over Jordan,
And what did I see,
Coming for to carry me home.
A band of (f**king) angels,
Coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

If you get there before I do,
Coming for to carry me home,
Tell all my friends,
I'm coming too.
Coming for to carry me home.

Take me out to the hash run

Tune: Take me out to the ball game

Take me out to the hash run
Bring me back to your room
Buy me some condoms for sex, sex, sex
Ribbed French Ticklers are always the best

So it’s push push push until you climax
If I don’t come it’s a shame
For it’s ooh uhh  oh my god!
I forgot your name!

Time of the Month (Blood on Trail song)

You can tell, by the smell, that she isn't very well,
When the end of the month comes around.
It'll rank, it'll stink, it'll turn your pecker pink
When the end of the month comes around.

So it's Hi Hi hee to the Tampon Industry
Shout out your sizes
Small... Large... Junior Miss.... Palm Tree
So it's Hi Hi hee to the Tampon Industry
When the end of the month comes around.

[Keep 'em stuffin']
when the end of the month comes around.
Drink it down down down

Tit song

Her left tit hit me on the right side
Her right tit hit me over here
If both of her big t*ts had missed me
I wouldn't have spilled all my beer

True Blue

Here's to ...., he's true blue,
He's a Hasher, through and through,
He's a Pisspot, so they say,
Tried to get to heaven but he went the other way.
So drink, drink, drink....

Twinkie, Twinkie, Little Hasher

Tune: Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star

Twinkie, twinkie, little Hasher,
Can't you suck a little faster?
Down upon my meat so slow,
Like a whale about to blow,
Twinkie, twinkie, little Hasher,
Can't you suck a little faster?

Virgins

Tune: Flintsones

Virgins, meet the Hashers
Were the biggest drunks in history
From the town of Sydney
They're the leaders in debauchery
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years
Watch them as they down a lot of beers
Down, down, down, down, down, down
Down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down
Down, down, down, down, down
Down, down, down, down, down, down!

What a Wank

Tune: William Tell Overture

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,
What a wank, what a wank, wank, wank.

Where were you last month (song for returners)

Where, Oh Where were you last month/week?
Why did you make us hash all alone?
You Fat Lazy b**tards, You weren't even here.
So we f**ked all the virgins and drank all the beer.

Whip it Out at the Ball Game

Whip It Out at the Ball Game,
Wave It Round at the Crowd,
Dip It in Jello and Cracker Jack,
I Don't Care If You Give It a Whack,
Cause It's Beat Your Meat at the Ball Game,
If You Don't Come It's a Shame,
For It's One, Two,
And You're Covered In Goo,
At The Old Ball Game!

Why Are We Waiting?

Tune: Come Let Us Adore Him

Why are we waiting,
Could be masturbating,
Oh, why are we waiting,
So f**king long.

Oh, why are we waiting,
Could be fornicating,
Oh, why are we waiting,
Oh, why are we waiting,
Oh, why are we waiting,
So f**king long!

Why was he born so beautiful?

Why was he born at all?
He's no f**king use to anyone,
He's no f**king use at all.

He may be a joy to his mother
But he's a pain in the asshole to me.
Drink it down, down, down, down...

He ought to be thoroughly pissed on,
He ought to be publicly shot,
He ought to be tied to a dunny
And left there to fester and rot.
Drink it down, down, down, down...

Wings of an Eagle

If I had the wings of an eagle,
If I had the wings of a crow,
I’d fly above the treetops,
And shit on the hashers below.

Shit on, shit on,
I’d shit on the hashers below, below
Shit on, shit on,
I’d shit on the hashers below.

Zuma Warrior

Ah lay zuma, zuma, zuma, ah lay zuma, zuma hey,
Ah lay zuma, zuma, zuma, ah lay zuma, zuma hey,
Drink it down you Zuma Warrior,
Drink it down Zuma Chief, Chief, Chief, Chief...