Songs

All Australians

All Australians are born illegitimate, born illegitimate, born illegitimateAll Australians are born illegitimate, b**tards through and throughThey aint got no birth certificate, birth certificate, birth certificateThey aint got no birth certificate, b**tards through and throughThey don't quite know who their father is, who their father is, who their father is,They don't quite know who the father is, b**tards through and throughThe Union Jack's on the Aussie flag, doo dah doo dah,The Union Jack's on the Aussie flag, all the doo dah day

Always a Woman

She's got the greatest tongue workThat you’ve ever seenShe licks both my balls tillThey're shiny and cleanAnd her pink little pussy'sAs tight as it can beI know it's the cat butIt feels like a woman to me

Asshole, Asshole

Asshole, asshole,A soldier I would be,To piss, to piss,Two pistols on my knee.f**k you, f**k you,For curiosity.To fight for the old c**tTo fight for the old c**tFight for the old country.

And the Hairs

And the hairs,And the hairs,And the hairs on her d**ky-di-do,Hang down to her knees,One black one, one white one,And one with a bit of shite on,One with a fairy light onTo lead us the way

Bestiality

Tune: Tie Me Kangaroo Down, BoysCHORUS:Bestiality's best boys,Bestiality's best, f**k a wallabee.Bestiality's best boys,Bestiality's best

Blessing the hares

Bless these hares,Bless this trail,Cops no catch us,Bogans no shoot us,Dog no bite us,Heat no stroke us,Plenty of cold beer and bubbly to drink,Hope we all get laid tonight.

Cross-Dressing Hashing Man

Tune: Popeye, the Sailor ManHe's a cross-dressing hashing mantoot, tootWears garters whenever he cantoot, tootWith bra straps too tight,but panties just right,he's a cross-dressing hashing mantoot, toot

Dinah

Tune: I've Been Working on the RailroadDinah, won't you blow me,Dinah, won't you blow me,Dinah, won't you blow my horn?Dinah, won't you blow me,Dinah, won't you blow me,Dinah, won't you blow my horn?Someone's in my sister's vagina,Someone's in my sister, I know,Someone's in my sister's vagina,f**kin' like a dynamo.

Do your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low?Do your balls hang low?Do they wobble to and 'fro?Can you tie 'em in a knot?Can you tie 'em in a bow?Can you throw them over your shoulder Like a continental soldierDo your balls hang low?

Dough the stuff

Dough the stuff that buys my beerRay, the guy who sells me beerMe, the one who drinks my beerFar, a long way to the johnSo, I’ll have another beerLa, I ‘ll have another beerTea, no thanks I’ll have a beerThat’ll bring us back to Down Down...

Fellatio Song

Tune: For he's a jolly good fellowFor he enjoys fellatioFor he enjoys fellatioFor he enjoys fellationHe swallows everytimeHe swallows everytimeHe swallows everytimeFor he enjoys fellatio...

F*ck a duck

f**k a duck, a female duck,Screw a baby kangaroo.Finger-bang an orangutan,Let an elephant do you.Fell the penis of an eel,Whack the asshole of a yak.Masturbate with a gnu,And that will bring you back to,f**k, f**k, f**k, f**k...

Has anyone seen my cock?

Has anybody seen my cock,My big Rhode Island Red?He's mostly pink, with a little bit of blue,And  purple on his head.He stands straight up in the morning,And he gives me wife a shock,Has anybody seen, anybody seen,Anybody, anybody seen my cock?

Hash Shirt

Tune: Meet the FlintstonesHash shirt...Where's your hash shirt?You’re the cheapest b**tard in historyHash shirt.. Buy a hash shirt.So you can join us in debauchery

He's the meanest

He's the meanest,He sucks the horse's penis,He's the meanest,He's a horse's ass.All he does is pound it,Ever since he found it,He's the meanest,He's a horse's ass.[alt verse]He's the lamest,He licks the horse's anus,He's the meanest,He's a horse's ass.

Heres to Brother Hasher

Tune: Ach, Du Lieber, AugustinHere's to brother hasherB4other hasher, brother hasherHere's to brother hasherMay he chug-a-lugHe's happy, he's jolly,He's f**ked up by golly,Here's to brother hasherMay he chug-a-lugSo drink motherf**kerDrink motherf**kerDrink motherf**kerDrink motherf**ker

Hey Hey we’re the Hashers

Tune: Hey Hey we’re the MonkeysHere we cummmRunning down your streetWe get the funniest looks from..Everyone we meet.Hey Hey we’re the hashers.People say we run aroundBut we’re to busy drinking.To put anybody down down down down

I'm a little sex pot

Tune: I'm a little tea potI'm a little sex potshort and stoutHere are my handlesHere is my spoutWhen I get all f**ked upHear me shoutTip me overand eat me out

Jesus Saves

Tune: Battle Hymn of the Republic Notes: This song usually begins with an optional verse before the chorus is sung, but I’ve still listed the optional verses afterwards. For optional verses, the line is repeated three times before “Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves” is sung. At the conclusion of the song hashers usually fall to their knees and pray with the refrain “Jesus we’re only kidding.”CHORUS:Free beer for all the hashers;Free beer for all the hashers;Free beer for all the hashers;Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves!Optional Verses:Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause he’s nailed upon the cross;All the girls love Jesus ’cause he’s hung like this (spread out arms);Jesus don’t need flour ’cause he lays the trail in blood;Don’t give your beer to Jesus ’cause he’ll turn it into wine;Jesus won’t come hashing because Judas pissed him off;Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause he’s only got 12 friends.Jesus can’t go hashing, 'cause the shiggy is on his head.Jesus can’t go hashing ’cause his dad knows all the trails.Jesus can't go hashing cause he's mowing my front lawnJesus can't go hashing cause he only knows one whoreJesus can't go hashing cause the shiggy's on his headLast verse:Jesus we're only kidding... Jesus we're only kidding... Jesus we're only kidding... Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves!

It's a Small Dick

Tune: It's a Small WorldWell it's not too long and it's not to thick,It gets hard too slow, and it cums too quick,It gets lost in her twat,But it's all that he's got,It's a small, small d**k. It's a small d**k after all,It's a small d**k after all,Always limp from alcohol,It's a small, small, d**k!

Love Me Tender

Tune: Love Me TenderLove me tenderLove me sweetWrap your lipsaround my meatWatch me quiverWatch me grinAs my cumdrips down down down

Mrs. Murphy

Take it by the hand Mrs Murphy,It only weighs a quarter of a pound,Its got hair around it’s neck like a turkey,And it comes when you stroke it up and down,Down, down, down

My One Skin 

Tune: My Bonnie Lies Over the OceanMy one skin hangs down to my two skin,My two skin hangs down to my three,My three skin hangs down to my foreskinMy foreskin hangs down to my knee.CHORUS:Roll back, roll back,Please roll back my foreskin for me, for me.Roll back, roll back,Please roll back my foreskin for me.

New Shoes A Shoes Shoeys

Tune: Hey JudeNew shoes Now take one offPour some beer inAnd drink it downRemember, whenever you come to the hashIf you wear new shoesYou’re gonna drink itDown down down down down downHeyDrink it down down downDown da down down  downDown da down down  down

Ou Est le Papier?

Tune: MarseillaiseA Frenchman went to the lavat'ryTo have him a jolly good shit,He took his coat and trousers offSo that he could revel in it.But when he reached for the paperHe found that someone had been there before,"Ou est le papier?"Ou est le papier?Monsieur, monsieur, J'at fait manure.Ou est le papier?

Put Your Leg Over My Shoulder

Tune: Side by SidePut your left leg over my shoulder,Put your right leg over my shoulder,(Wag tongue)La-la-la-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.Put your left tit over my shoulder,Put your right tit over my shoulder,(Shake head side to side)Bla-bla-bla-bla, bla-bla-bla, bla-bla-bla.

Short down down song

This is your down-down song, It isn’t very long.Drink it down, down, down, down..

Shitty Trail

S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-LShitty trailShitty trailThe mother f**kers laid a shitty trailS-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L

Swing Low

Swing low, sweet chariot,Coming for to carry me home,Swing low, sweet chariot,Coming for to carry me home.I looked over Jordan,And what did I see,Coming for to carry me home.A band of (f**king) angels,Coming after me,Coming for to carry me home.If you get there before I do,Coming for to carry me home,Tell all my friends,I'm coming too.Coming for to carry me home.

Sweet Heart Song

Let me call you sweetheartI'm in love with youLet me suck your nipplestil they're black and blueLet me lick your pussytil it's wet with GULet me slip my willyup your ole' wazoo

Take me out to the hash run

Tune: Take me out to the ball gameTake me out to the hash runBring me back to your roomBuy me some condoms for sex, sex, sexRibbed French Ticklers are always the bestSo it’s push push push until you climaxIf I don’t come it’s a shameFor it’s ooh uhh  oh my god!I forgot your name!

Time of the Month

You can tell, by the smell, that she isn't very well,When the end of the month comes around.It'll rank, it'll stink, it'll turn your pecker pinkWhen the end of the month comes around.So it's Hi Hi hee to the Tampon IndustryShout out your sizesSmall... Large... Junior Miss....bail of hay... Palm TreeSo it's Hi Hi hee to the Tampon IndustryWhen the end of the month comes around.[Keep 'em stuffin']when the end of the month comes around.Drink it down down down

True Blue

Here's to ...., he's true blue,He's a Hasher, through and through,He's a Pisspot, so they say,Tried to get to heaven but he went the other way.So drink, drink, drink....

Twinkie, Twinkie, Little Hasher

Tune: Twinkle, Twinkle, Little StarTwinkie, twinkie, little Hasher,Can't you suck a little faster?Down upon my meat so slow,Like a whale about to blow,Twinkie, twinkie, little Hasher,Can't you suck a little faster?

Virgins

Tune: FlintsonesVirgins, meet the HashersWere the biggest drunks in historyFrom the town of SydneyThey're the leaders in debaucheryHalf minds, trailing shiggy through the yearsWatch them as they down a lot of beersDown, down, down, down, down, downDown, down, down, down, down, down, down, downDown, down, down, down, downDown, down, down, down, down, down!

What a Wank

Tune: William Tell OvertureWhat a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,What a wank, what a wank, wank, wank.

Whip it Out at the Ball Game

Whip It Out at the Ball Game,Wave It Round at the Crowd,Dip It in Jello and Cracker Jack,I Don't Care If You Give It a Whack,Cause It's Beat Your Meat at the Ball Game,If You Don't Come It's a Shame,For It's One, Two,And You're Covered In Goo,At The Old Ball Game!

Where were you last week?

Where, Oh where were you last month/week?Why did you make us hash all alone?You Fat Lazy b**tards, You weren't even here.So we f**ked all the virgins and drank all the beer.

Why Are We Waiting?

Tune: Come Let Us Adore HimWhy are we waiting,Could be masturbating,Oh, why are we waiting,So f**king long.Oh, why are we waiting,Could be fornicating,Oh, why are we waiting,Oh, why are we waiting,Oh, why are we waiting,So f**king long!

Why was he born so beautiful?

Why was he born at all?He's no f**king use to anyone,He's no f**king use at all.He may be a joy to his motherBut he's a pain in the asshole to me.Drink it down, down, down, down...

Wings of an Eagle

If I had the wings of an eagle,If I had the wings of a crow,I’d fly above the treetops,And shit on the hashers below.Shit on, shit on,I’d shit on the hashers below, belowShit on, shit on,I’d shit on the hashers below.

Zuma Warrior

Ah lay zuma, zuma, zuma, ah lay zuma, zuma hey,Ah lay zuma, zuma, zuma, ah lay zuma, zuma hey,Drink it down you Zuma Warrior,Drink it down Zuma Chief, Chief, Chief, Chief...

He ought to be publicly pissed on

He ought to be thoroughly pissed on,He ought to be publicly shot,He ought to be tied to a dunnyAnd left there to fester and rot.Drink it down, down, down, down...

My DNA

Young Girl,I like it when you go down,I said, “young girl!”,Won’t you kneel on the ground,I said “young girl!”,With your lips full and round,On your knees you make me hap–py.(Spit, spit, spit, spit, spit)I want to spray you with my DNA,I want to spray you with my DNA,It’s a present from me,a gift to all of the girls,For you, here are my facial pearls

No No Square

Stop! Don't touch me there. This is my no no square. (x2)Your sexual advances are not appealing. In fact I'm starting to get the "uh oh" feeling. And my momma said my special parts were just for me. So why in the world are you trying to creep?Stop! Don't touch me there. This is my no no square. (x2)To try and touch my square takes a lot of nerve. Who do you think you are, you freaky deaky perv? There's a dude with some candy in a shady ol' van. I think he wants to mess with my purity plan.Stop! Don't touch me there. This is my no no square. (x2)My square's not a circle, a period, or dot, It's just my one little very own spot, So take your grubby dirty little hands off me, Why don't you respect my privacy?I just wanna be left all alone, So step off me and go back home, I'll tell ya again, if you're not aware, That this is my own no no square.Stop! Don't touch me there. This is my no no square. (x3)A

Shitty Hare (Bon Jovi Version)

We wanted to find flour and chalkBut lost on your trailIt said you’ve been fuckedIt suckedIt suckedWe wanted to drink Coopers GreenBut lost on your trailWe settled for VBIt suckedIt suckedYou’ve gotta hold on to the drink that you’ve gotIt doesn’t make a difference if it’s beer or a shotThis is for the tit checks you forgot on trailYour drinking a lotWhoa-oh there’s no flour out therewhoa-oh you’re a shitty hareTake some flour and use it on trailWhoa-oh you’re a shitty hare(High-pitched) You’re a shitty hare!

My Name is Jack

My name is Jack (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),I’m a necrophiliac (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),I fuck dead women (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),And I fill ’em full of jism (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah).I get frustrated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),When they’re cremated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),Cause try as I must (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),I can’t fuck dust!My name is GusI’m incestuousI fucked my motherAnd buggered my brotherBut when they dieI will not cryCuz just like JackI’m a necrophiliacMy name is KyleI’m a pedophileI fuck little boysI get ’em with toysIf I have a sonI’ll be much funCause just like GusI’m incestuous

She Likes it in the kitchen

She likes it in the kitchen,She likes it in the kitchen,She likes it in the kitchen,The kitchen means her ass!

Incest Time in Texas

When it’s incest time in Texas,And there’s no cunt to be found,Your mother’s in the bathroom,Her panties halfway down,No time for masturbation,No time to beat your meat,When it’s incest time in Texas,Mother-fucking can’t be beat!

U-G-L-Y

U-G-L-Y, you ain’t got no alibi,You ugly, you ugly, yeah, yeah, you ugly!Optional Verses:M-O-M-M-A, she’s the one who made you that way,Your momma, your momma, your momma says you ugly!D-A-D-D-Y, you don’t even know that guy,Your daddy, your daddy, your daddy thinks you’re ugly!U-N-C-L-E, that who your real dad be,Your uncle, your uncle, your uncle thinks your ugly!C-O-U-S-I-N, that is who you’re marryin’,Your cousin, your cousin, your cousin thinks you’re ugly!I-N-B-R-E-D, that is what your kids will be,They’re inbred, they’re inbred, your kids think you’re ugly!C-U-T-E, you wish you were cute like me,I’m cute, I’m cute, I’m really fucking cute!

Thursday is a Hashing Day

Today is Monday, (Today is Monday)Monday is a wanking day. (Monday is a wanking day)CHORUS:Leader: Is ev’rybody happy?All: You bet your ass we are!Da da dut da da, da da dut da daADDITIONAL VERSES:Today is Tuesday,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)Today is Wednesday,Wednesday is a mmhmm day,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)Today is Thursday,Thursday is a hashing day,Wednesday is a mmhmm day,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)Today is Friday,Friday is a fucking day,Thursday is a hashing day,Wednesday is a mmhmm day,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)Today is Saturday,Saturday is a drinking day,Friday is a fucking day,Thursday is a hashing day,Wednesday is a mmhmm day,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)Today is Sunday,Sunday is a day or rest.Saturday is a drinking day,Friday is a fucking day,Thursday is a hashing day,Wednesday is a mmhmm day,Tuesday is a finger day.Monday is a wanking day. (chorus)

Boa's Lament

(To the tune of My Favourite Things)
Singing in circle with neighbours complainingWondering if it will ever stop rainingLondon Fags trying to get some controlNot of the circle, but his leaky hole. Merkins quite funny if we'd only listenCherries so smart that the joke we keep missingCircle goes on for so fucking longCause none of us cunts can remember the songs Gasping for air on the hills of North SydneyDrinking until you've shit out a kidneyFumbling for grog in the cold in the parkTrying to cop a cheap feel in the dark When you're on trailWhen the rains goneWhen the checks are markedBoa will drink till he thinks he looks hotThen dance in the nude for a lark Watching in horror at Deadly in trafficThinking she really should wear a straight jacketCrossing the road like she's rolling the diceWondering if she is still smoking the ice IT's NO DEADLYWhen the lights redAnd our faces paleIf she can survive to get back to the parkShe can get downing some ales Laughing as virgins are creeped out by hashersWho'll gobble them up like some fresh crispy rashersHanging around them like flies around shiteThey'll never be virgins by the end of the night Bastardbator,turns the charm onMakes them feel so safeBut it's probably not their, favourite thingWhen they wake up, at his place Hashing thru shiggy and jumping the dog shiteSickF&ckers moaning cause something just ain't rightMoaning missmanagement's causing him stressJust cause he no longer fits in a dress As a lady,he's so pretty,that I'm getting hardBut when he turns back into a blokeI wouldn't shit in his yard

A Finger in your Ear?

How would, you like, my finger in your ear?How would, you like, my finger in your ear?Oh no, not fucking likely, not fucking likely, not fucking li-kely.How would, you like, my finger in your rear?How would, you like, my finger in your rear?Oh no, not fucking likely, not fucking likely, not fucking li-kely.

The Hash Prayer

Our Lager, Which Art In BarrelsHallowed Be Thy DrinkThy Will Be Drunk, (I Will Be Drunk)At Home As It Is In The PubGive Us This Day Our Foamy PintAnd Forgive Us Our SpillagesAs We Forgive Those Who Spill Against UsAnd Lead Us Not Into Poncey Wine DrinkingBut Deliver Us From Hang-OversFor Thine Is The Beer, The Bitter And The LagerFor Ever And EverBar Men

You're not number 5

You're not number 5, Not number 4, Number 3, Number 2 You're number one! (middle finger)

Rule Britannia

Rule Britannia, marmalade and jam.Five Chinese crackers up your arseholeBang, bang, bang, bang, bang.

A Skeeter on my Peter

There’s a skeeter on my peter whack it offThere’s a skeeter on my peter whack it offThere’s a dozen on my cousin, I can hear those bastards buzzinThere’s a skeeter on my peter whack it off

I Used to Work in Chicago

I used to work in Chicago, in an old department storeI used to work in Chicago, but I don’t work there anymoreCall: A woman came in for some velvetResponse: Some velvet from the store?Call: Velvet she wanted, felt she got!Response: Oh, I don’t work there anymore!ChorusAlternative call and response verses:A computer she wanted, my hard drive she got.
Help she wanted, my AIDS she got.
A translator she wanted, my cunning-linguist she got.
A nail she wanted, a screw she got.
Carpet she wanted, shag she got.
A fishing rod she wanted, my pole she got.
A diamond choker she wanted, a pearl necklace she got.
Camels she wanted, humped she got.
A KitKat she wanted, four fingers she got.
A screen door she wanted, slammed she got.
A front door she wanted, the back door she got.
Paper she wanted, a ream she got.
A ruler she wanted, 12 inches she got.
A hammer she wanted, nailed she got.
A horse she wanted, donkey punched she got.
An application she wanted, filled out she got.
A helicopter she wanted my chopper she got A Big Mac she wanted, A whopper she got Fireworks she wanted, banged she got A vacuum she wanted, sucked she got A piano she wanted, my organ she got A muscle car she wanted, my hot rod she got A hat she wanted, my helmet she got A damp cat she wanted, wet pussy she got Turkey she wanted, gobbled she got Barbecue she wanted spit roasted she got Sprite she wanted, 7-Up she got A skull & crossbones she wanted, jolly rogered she got A jumper she wanted, jump her I did Seafood she wanted, crabs she got A pipe she wanted, hosed she got A glazed doughnut she wanted, cream filled she got An elevator she wanted, my shaft she got Bolts she wanted, my nuts she got Ham she wanted, porked she got Butter she wanted, spread she got A pony she wanted, ridden she got Some wheels she wanted, rimmed she got Brass taps she wanted, a golden shower she got A bowling ball she wanted, fingered and thrown in the gutter she got Liquor she wanted, lick her I did Coffee she wanted, grind her I did A sailor she wanted, semen she got A hand she wanted, a fist she got

With an F, with an F, with an F U C

With an F, with an F With an F-U-CWith an F-U-C-K-Y-O-UWith an F, with an F With an F-U-C With a K, Y-O-UFuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck youFuck you in the morningFuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck youFuck you in the eveningWith an F, with an F With an F-U-CWith an F-U-C-K-Y-O-UWith an F, with an F With an F-U-C With a K, Y-O-U 

Hot Vagina

Hot vagina for you breakfast,Hot vagina for your lunch Hot vagina for your dinner,It’s munch, munch, munch, munch, munch.It’s delicious and nutritious,The flavor can’t be beat,So take a tip and lick a clit,Hot vagina can’t be beat. 

Pissonya

Pissonya, pissonya, pissonyaIn Russian it means I love yaIf I had my way I'd piss on ya all dayPissonya, pissonya, pissonyaShitonya, shitonya, shitonyaIn Russian it means I adore yaIf I had my way I'd shit on ya all day Shitonya, shitonya, shitonyaCumonya, cumonya, cumonyaIn Russian it means I need yaIf I had my way I'd cum on ya all dayCumonya, cumonya, cumonya